David Hockney has indirectly been incredibly important to me during a very difficult period of my life. Thanks to him I'm probably the only art student to ever win "Best Talk" at a conference for physics students.

Over half a lifetime ago now I tried studying physics. I failed miserably at it, and after a few years had to make the difficult decision of dropping out (it would take another 15 years before I would get the ADHD diagnosis that explained my struggles). This was nothing short of an identity crisis for me, on top of already struggling with my mental health for years, since becoming a scientist (or what childhood me thought a scientist was) had been a lifelong dream of mine.

Younger me decided to go all in on that identity crisis, I guess, since I switched to studying art. I was absolutely miserable during the first year, not knowing what I was going to do with my life and feeling like a complete loser. Oh, and my first serious relationship also ended on a very bad note around the same period. Those probably were the most depressing months of my life.

Around that time, friends from my former studies asked if I was going to join the International Congress of Physics Students again the next year. At first I declined, thinking it would just be a confrontation with my personal failures. I never even managed to get to the point of having a basic student project of my own to present a poster or talk about!

Then our art history teacher showed us a documentary about the Hockney-Falco thesis[0]. Which argued that the jump in realism shown by Renaissance painters was due to them secretly having access to optical aids like the camera obscura long before they officially were considered to be known to European cultures. A topic that bridged art and science.

And then, maybe as a response to being sick and tired of how I was feeling sorry for myself, I "decided" I that was going to hitchhike to ICPS 2008 in Krakow[1], meet another cute hitchhiker on the way to have a brief summer romance with, give the best talk of the conference using the HF thesis to illustrate differences between art and science, and then live happily ever after.

Absolutely ridiculous of course, but I needed a goal to keep me going. I'm actually quite introverted and used to be terribly scared of giving presentations, or anything that would draw attention to me really. Realistically I just hoped a few people would show up and enjoy the talk. But as a weird kind of self-help occupational therapy (and probably also out of fear) I went all-in on preparing the talk when not at school.

I tried to cram every sprawling thought on the topic into the talk, ending up with about 120 slides. I had 20 minutes for the presentation. Instead of doing the sensible thing of cutting down on content (did I mention I would get an ADHD diagnosis a 15 years later?) I ended up doing dry runs multiple times in the mirror with a clock, figuring out where it needed rewriting and reorganization slides to make the story flow better, and so on. Oh, and of course each slide had to have at least one joke too.

Hitchhiking from the Netherlands to ICSP 2008 ended up being a lot of fun, but no romance sadly. Then I ended up being really grateful to past me for obsessively preparing, because instead of a handful of friends showing moral support for the art weirdo like I expected, the auditorium was completely full. To my own surprise I wasn't scared because I had prepared my material so much. And the audience loved it, to the point of my talk being picked as best talk of the conference afterwards.

And as a cherry on top I met a cute Polish hitchhiker on the way home who also felt like having a brief summer fling :).

As for the "lived happily ever after" bit, obviously life still has its hardships, but yes, I'm generally happy with my life now. Because that personal success was the first time I started actually believing my life could get better, and it on average has had an upward trajectory ever since as a result.

So thanks, Hockney, you never knew me but in a way you probably saved my life, and it wasn't even with your art (love your collages though!)

[0] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hockney%E2%80%93Falco_thesis

[1] https://web.archive.org/web/20080215014752/http://www.icps.a...

David Hockney, Who Restored the Human Form to Art, Dies at 88